The Witty Ways of a Wayward Woman

Music Mondays; It’s Eurovision Time! (Mrs T’s Eurovision Memoirs)

You know it had to happen didn’t you? Yes, it was inevitable that sometime I would have to dwell upon that most ridiculed of subjects in the UK – The Eurovision Song Contest. Yep, we are only a few days away from that supreme masterpiece of international diplomacy and display of musical mastery which brings the entire British nation weeping to its knees. Why is this so? Yes, we the nation who produced The Beatles, Queen and Des O’connor can barely secure a few miserable points no matter how good (or bad) our songs are. We are the outcasts of Europe! Last year we came last. Yes, that’s LAST with a pathetic 14 points. I thought playing Even If sung by the lovely Andy Abraham would be a good prelude to Mrs T’s Eurovision Memoirs a little feature I will be posting regularly over the next 2 weeks highlighting some

janeturley 3 May 2009 3 Comments

I can talk to the animals!

It’s true! Yes, during the Easter holidays I took Master Benedict and Master Jacob to Whipsnade zoo for one of those delightful family excursions where by the time you get home you are wondering what on earth you were thinking about when you decided that procreation was a good idea. (Note: In my opinion it is always wise to keep a set of divorce papers handy for these situations – you maybe be able to swing yourself a better deal – especially if you were foolish enough to sign a prenuptial agreement. I haven’t actually managed to swing it myself yet but I’ve got a outing planned to LegoWorld which might just do the trick. I hear all those little bricks can cause a lot of frustration.) Strangely, whilst I was at Whipsnade Zoo, I had one of those bizarre experiences similar to the one I had on the ferry

janeturley 2 May 2009 4 Comments

Introducing Miss Pixie Lott

I’ve got so many blogs waiting to write – if only I had more time! I could write one every day but I’ve got too much to do – take for example this morning I have a tennis lesson with the lovely young Simon which (cough, cough) must take priority…… well you know my backhand does need improving… and of course I’m doing this for the boys so that I can play better with them as its become rather embarrassing being beaten by a 10 year old. And of course one day I also hope to beat the lovely Mrs D, my friend the tennis coach, in a game of finely tuned skills, strength and cunnning strategy. (Calling all her shots “out” and cutting the strings on her racquet.) After tennis it’s the hairdressers where I will be humbly apologizing for forgetting to go to my last appointment which was

janeturley 30 April 2009 5 Comments

Little Miss Tigga (aka The Cat from Hell)

Yes, Miss Tigga was the ultimate Cat from Hell but you know folks I was more than a little fond of her. Above is a piccy of Tigga aged about 12 months, along with Master Sam aged about 3 months. As you can see at this stage she was still pretty curious about the new arrival and in this particular photo was staking her claim to be in no 1 pole position in my affections. Fortunately, after circling Master Sam’s cot on top of the rails about a thousand times (she used to walk around the bath rim as well and once fell in) she realised he was not going to feed her and cater to her every whim so I didn’t have many worries about her invading his space. Instead, Miss Tigga took to biting my ankles and scratching the doors for my attention…. sometimes if she was a

janeturley 27 April 2009 13 Comments

Music Monday; X rated!

The song I’m playing today is one of my favourites for getting into the groove and boy what a sexy little number it is! I’d like to think that I looked as good as the young ladies in this video but alas the curlers, pinny and 50 denier tights just don’t have the same effect. Shame. But in my mind well…..you know…things are a lot better….. Just a Little by Liberty X was released in 2001 when they were running high from their failure in the reality show Popstars. Yep … that’s failure. This is because the band comprised the five losing finalists. Bizarrely, the winning five contestants who landed a prized record contract went onto to abysmal failure after their intial popularity and sank without trace in about 18 months as the floptastic group Hear’Say. In contrast Liberty X stayed together until 2006 and although they have now officially

janeturley 26 April 2009 8 Comments

Maths defies Logic!

Okay, okay I know I haven’t exactly had a good track record in the car department of late but it’s not my fault. Really.Did I tell you about the time I managed to avoid a boat trailer on the M1? (That’s a very busy UK motorway if you’re not familiar with our terminology.) It had detached from the car in front and was wavering about all over the motorway. Yep, somehow I managed to avoid it without causing a pile up. Amazing! I admit though that Young Master Jacob may have had his hands over his face and may have been screaming words to the effect of “We are all going to die!” (He’s watched Zulu too many times.) Right, what was I going to talk about before I got sidetracked on that bit of conceited “make myself feel better at driving because no one else does will do it

janeturley 20 April 2009 7 Comments

Experimenting with writing.

As some of you are aware I have been experimenting with my writing. A while back I wrote a short story which was published on The View From Here which I’ve now also published below it’s called In the Wink of an Eye. It marks quite a different departure for me as it’s a war story which has quite a surreal element to it. It is also written in the Second Person; an idea which I’d been toying with for sometime but finally got the push to do it when I read that Georgie was experimenting with it too. I’m sure that this story won’t be to everyone’s taste, especially as people are used to me being pretty silly, but any feedback is welcome, either positive or negative. I enjoy exploring different ideas, situations and emotions as much as I like writing humorous material. In fact, my book is turning out to

janeturley 16 April 2009 13 Comments

Music Monday; Seven beautiful seconds.

I first heard the song I’m playing today back in 1994 when it was an international hit and I’m not sure quite what is is about this song but it has really got under my skin – in a positive way. It has a quite a repetitive beat and lyrics which is nothing new in a song obviously but I never get tired listening to it. Vocally, there are no highs or lows it’s just very melodic and easy to listen to and it’s just slipped under my skin and every time I hear it I want to hear it over and over again. I think sometimes videos add to the addictiveness and potency of a song but whilst looking for this song on You Tube I realised that I’d never actually seen the accompanying video. But actually it is quite an interesting one made simply in black and white

janeturley 14 April 2009 6 Comments

HAPPY EASTER!

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

janeturley 12 April 2009 3 Comments

Epiphany

It was Epiphany. Later this evening he’d switch off the Christmas lights and the garden would be shrouded once more in the dark January night. On the weekend he’d return, remove the lights and put them safely back in the loft where they’d been stored for as long as he could remember. But now he gazed out of the window watching his mother sitting upon the garden bench, shoulders hunched, collar upturned, alone in the naked garden. Maybe it was time. He snapped open the clasps of his briefcase, the sound reverberating in the stillness of the room. His actions, his feelings, seemed magnified as he slowly withdrew the creased envelope. His secret. “Maybe you should come on in Mum. It’s freezing.” He sat down beside her. The cold, damp fingers of the night already penetrating his thick Aran sweater. “I will in a minute Dear. I was just thinking

janeturley 10 April 2009 2 Comments

If you’re not the one

Well there I was talking about Daniel Bedingfield on Monday and then his song, If you’re not the one popped up on the radio this morning. I’ve got his CD with this song on it anyway but I’ve not heard it for for a while on the radio. At the moment the radio is suffering from an overdose of Beyonce’s If I were a boy which, very possibly, may drive me to complete insanity if I hear it just one more time. In fact, even the young masters nearly threw themselves out the car windows onto the duel carriageway the other day when we’d heard it for about the fourth time in one day. The local DJ is obviously obsessed with the song but I reckon he should watch out in case some nutty fruitcake housewife rings up the station uttering the words “Play Misty for me.”Know what I mean?

janeturley 8 April 2009 4 Comments