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The often dubious, politically incorrect and mainly humorous musings of Ms Jane Turley, (Ex) Housewife Extraordinaire.

#AtoZChallenge 2025

To Keep or not to Keep?

Oh no, I’ve done it again! I opened my big mouth about Cheryl Cole’s purple trousers – forgetting I’d actually ordered something purple myself. As it happens, I like the colour purple very much so when I was surfing trusty old Marks and Spencers for something suitably staid (socks, braces that kind of thing) for Mr T for the forthcoming Father’s Day I accidentally (cough, cough) clicked on the women’s section and came across a purple jumpsuit, ideal ( or so  I thought) for lounging around in on a hot day. (Not that we get many of those in the UK but I like to look on the bright side.)

So yesterday the jumpsuit arrived and I thought it was FAB. Yes, I loved it. It’s a lovely colour, a good fit and has a touch of the exotic. Yes, yes, I know it’s more suitable for a holiday in the Caribbean but I can dream can’t I? Anyway, I can always dip my feet in the kids’ old paddling pool in the back garden – there’s nothing like a top notch paddling session to keep the spirits up. I must remember to get my rubber duck out – Daffy hasn’t had an outing for quite a while. He can play with my jugs and spatulas. Hours of simple fun – beats the hell out of ironing.

Anyway, delighted with my new purchase, I sashayed into the lounge to model it for Mr T thinking I looked the bee’s knees. He looks up, face suddenly aghast, and says

“I think you should send that back.”

Poor Mrs T is deflated! So I say (pompously)

” I will ask Master Jacob – he has good taste!”

So I go upstairs and call Master Jacob;

“Jacob, what do you think of my new outfit?”

Jacob pops his head round the corner of his room and then comes out looking very serious;

“Is anyone else going to see it?”

“Well I suppose so…”

Now Mrs T is even more deflated. However, at that very moment Master Benedict emerges from his room, takes a good look and shoots off back to his bedroom. Then, as I’m discussing the pros and cons of my jumpsuit with Master Jacob, ( I like it – he can barely control his vomiting) Master Benedict emerges from his room again with a large piece of paper on which he has written;

6/10

Hmm. Poor, poor Mrs T.  She has been cruelly and viciously deflated by the males in her family! What is she to do?  Shall she keep her purple jumpsuit or return it? What say you Readers? Are the male Turleys correct that Mrs T has made a ghastly purchase or should I ignore them and stash it in the back of the wardrobe to wear when no one else is within several miles? Oh the dilemmas, the dilemmas of being a badly dressed Housewife Extraordinaire…..

Ps – I bought Mr T something trendy – they were sold out of paisley ties.

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11 responses

  1. No comment from this section of the peanut gallery.

    I've learned my lesson far too well over the years, not just from dealing with the wife, but with my co-workers as well.

  2. Looks scrumptious–on the model. Would keep it. You can always put on a neutral coloured cardi when the Turley men are around and after all Master Benedict did give a 6/10 and not say a 2/10.

  3. It does indeed look scrumptious on the model – on me it is obviously a different matter according to the Turley boys! I have 35 days to return it- I guess I can wait to see if we have a summer – if we don't I can exchange it for a winter jumpsuit!!!

  4. I'd totally forgotten about the tagging Jane! So, not wanting to disappoint a lady, here you go:

    You've been tagged!

    To participate, you must abide by the following rules:

    Rule 1 – No Tag-Backs (you can't tag me back)
    Rule 2 – You must tag a further 8 bloggers
    Rule 3 – You must answer the questions below
    Rule 4 – You must have a link back to the people who tagged you

    And in the spirit of Bloggy fun, you must answer certain questions and publish them on your blog:

    If you could be any historical or current character who would you be?

    Name an interesting fact about yourself

    If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be?

    Which character traits annoy you?

    Name one thing that you would change in yourself?

    What do you consider your biggest achievement?

    Looking forward to your answers!

  5. Oh hurrah -a tag at last! something for me to whilst it's raining. (I am getting desperate to avoid that ironing pile.)

    It's definitely purple – bright purple in fact, Martin. It makes Cheryl's trousers look dull! Still, at least I'm not trying to team it up with orange…

  6. Er, um, excuseme for asking a personal question, but does it have a watering hole? Or does it all have to come off in the WC? If it does that would be a dealbreaker for me.

    Anna May Mangan x

  7. Hi Anna!

    A good point – and one I considered before buying as the last jumpsuit I had about 25 years ago was a nightmare if you needed a quick pee! However, since this one has no sleeves it's just like dropping the biggest pair of granny knickers you can imagine:)) (Which is probably another reason why I should never wear it outside of the house as I am now imagining it soaking wet in a pool of urine in a seaside public convienance…..)

    Yuck! You have got my imagination going places that normally I fear to tread. I think I better work on those pelvic floor exercises…:)

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