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The often dubious, politically incorrect and mainly humorous musings of Ms Jane Turley, (Ex) Housewife Extraordinaire.

A to Z: B is for Badass Brits.

Now, when I think of Badass Brits, I think of the likes of Jason Statham and Vinny Jones. Men with humble, working-class backgrounds who’ve made good and have a reputation as hard men in films. The kind of men who, 100 years ago, might have worked 12-hour shifts down the mines and still come home and dug the garden over.

 

 

 

Not like our present PM, Keir Starmer, who keeps trying to pass himself off as the son of a working-class toolmaker when, in fact, his father owned the tool factory.

 

 

 

 

 

Now, I do believe Herr Starmer knows a lot about tools. (I’ve heard he still works with them on a daily basis.) In fact, I heard he was able to build a cabinet with his tools, which frankly seems amazing given that rumour has it his tools are actually flaky cheap imports. They are definitely not power tools anyway.

 

Actually, I’ve heard Herr Starmer has more of an interest in hand tools, particularly vices and clamps. You can do a lot with vices, especially if you have a big hammer, a screwdriver, and maybe even a few attachments. In fact, given Keir’s family’s interest in tools, I’ve often wondered why he went into the legal profession when he could have gone into engineering in a bigger way. I mean, who isn’t interested in pistons and rods? I am. There’s nothing I like better than watching a firing piston. Hence, I spent so much time watching Thomas the Tank Engine with my kids. Secretly, I reckon Keir does too.

 

 

Yeah, so Kier is handy with tools. But is he a badass? A badass who will save the UK from terminal decline and cultural division?

 

 

Ah…probably not.

 

 

Yep, the UK is in terminal decline. It is so sad to see my birthplace, a land I have cherished and loved for sixty years, disintegrate into a cesspit.

 

 

But it’s not over yet. Something is happening. There is change afoot.

 

It whispers in the air. It sidles on the streets. And every now and again, it flickers on the faces of ordinary men.

 

Change is coming.

 

This change will not come from toolmakers or Whitehall civil servants. It will come from badass men like Jason Statham and Vinnie Jone—men who, like their forefathers, fought for Freedom and Democracy, for their women and children, for their King and country.

 

These will be the badass men in whose hands we, the people, will put our trust.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Latest Posts
A to Z: B is for Badass Brits.

Now, when I think of Badass Brits, I think of the likes of Jason Statham and Vinny Jones. Men with humble, working-class backgrounds who’ve made good and have a reputation as hard men in films. The kind of men who, 100 years ago, might have worked 12-hour shifts down the mines and still come home and dug the garden over.       Not like our present PM, Keir Starmer, who keeps trying to pass himself off as the son

Read More »
A to Z: Age is for Ageism

So, I reckon we should start off the A to Z with a rant on ageism and generally being old (read f***** over for the less sensitive amongst you.)   I know it’s hard to believe, but I started writing this blog in 2007 when I was 42. This makes me a dinosaur amongst the blogging community (i.e., I’m verging on the extinct), and last month, I turned 60.   Now, I know the kinder amongst you will be saying, “How

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New Website

After 18 years on another CMS, I have moved my blog to a more versatile platform. However, it will take some time while I perform some jiggery-pokery to get it exactly how I want it. So please bear with me as things fall off the page, are posted upside down and so on. It has also beome apparent that I will have to edit hundreds of posts as importing them has screwed up all the post layouts, especially paragraphs. This

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A Chicken Nugget A Day Keeps Justice Away

I have been forced. Yes, forced to come out of blog hibernation to comment on the latest scandal to hit the UK. God knows I have been tempted multiple times in the last few years to comment on some of the insane things happening in the UK and in the world, but sadly, life has just thrown too many curve balls at me. But today, I can take no more – I cannot keep my mouth shut any longer over

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My Nominees for the US and UK Elections and Other Waffle

It’s the early hours of the morning, and I have had a large gin… Late-night alcohol is always a good recipe for writing gibberish. And I have not written gibberish for a while on my blog as I have been busy writing gibberish for my MA in Comedy Writing. Which I recently passed with a distinction. Yay! Yes, it transpires that even academics can be fooled into thinking gibberish is genius. Excellent. So anyway, I have written two sitcoms, a

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Less is More (well that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it)

I’ve been practising my haikus, which you may recall, I’m not particularly good at. However, I wanted to address the woke issue in a concise, meaningful way as it is such a serious matter for discussion and particularly relevant to me as a comic writer. Which, if you know me,  translates as: 1) I’m too lazy to write a long analytical post. And 2) I’d rather watch a movie and eat tortilla chips. However, I feel obliged to say my

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