Last week was half term here which means the Young Masters had to be entertained. So one day whilst Master Jacob and Master Ben were happily ensconced on a 5hr training course (Yippee) Master Sam and I shot off to that splendid place of culture which is otherwise known as Milton Keynes.
The object of the exercise was to secure Master Sam a new Xbox360 game so I didn’t have to endure him sulking around the house for the remainder of the week. Unfortunately, Master Sam has the habit of being anxious to go home as soon as he has secured his purchase which means I have about 20 mins shopping time. Yeah, that’s right ladies – Sam is a man in the making. He takes after his father who can spend an hour looking at screwdrivers but when it comes to looking at ladies wear has no interest whatsoever or invariably says that he doesn’t like whatever it is I’m interested in. (Which is rather good for his wallet but alas not good for Mrs T’s depression.)
Anyhow, whilst Master Sam was occupied I nipped into my favourite shop; the discount book store, The Works, which is fortuitously situated next to Waterstones. The Works stocks all sorts of books at hugely discounted prices. I’ve bought lots of books from them in particular historical and factual books. There’s always loads of self help books too but I never look at those. Well not since the top shelf fell down on my head and I found myself on the floor with a copy over the Kama Sutra planted firmly over my face.
I was truly shocked.
I’ve never seen someone in that position before. I just couldn’t figure out how they got their legs at that angle…..
Anyway, this time I bought 3 fiction books for £5.00 and a copy of the AA Theory Test for Drivers. (I hasten to add that the Theory Test what NOT for me but for Master Sam who will be starting his driving lessons soon.)
Now for that price I don’t mind buying untested authors and I went for these;
1. Sins of our Fathers by Susan Howatch. I fell for the fact that the Sunday times said it was “Grippingly readable” on the front cover. The plot sounded a little predictable but I thought I’d give it a shot anyway.
2. Fear by Jeff Abbott. I chose this one because of the header on the back cover which read;
“I killed my best friend. I didn’t mean to, but I did. This is my story.”
Hmmm….that really appealed to me. I’ll read that one first out of the two.
3. The last one was a real find; Quake by Andy Remic. Just before Christmas I ordered Taint & other Novellas by Brian Lumley for Master Sam. It never arrived but about 3 weeks ago Biohell by Andy Remic turned up instead under the same order number. I contemplated sending it back but after reading some of the blurb;
“… an entire planet teeming with with corruption, guns, sex and designer drugs…….zombies….blood…shotguns…warzone… wasteland of murder and mutations….”
I thought to myself that it might be suitable material for Master Sam anyway.
In three weeks he has now read Biohell 3 times and is now reading Quake for a second time! I asked him for his opinion and he went out on a roll to give me this ground breaking long critique;
” Yeah, it’s alright.”
Huh. Teenagers. So helpful. And eloquent.
I checked out Andy Remic and found out he is a former English teacher in the UK who now writes full time. I had a look at his website here. I found it pretty amusing in places and I particularly liked the quote from Mrs Remic;
“I can’t believe I married this sicko!”
So hey, if you’ve got a teenage son this might be the author for them. I’m going to read Biohell myself (Master Sam thought it was the better of the two) cos… you know…I gotta see what he’s reading…. it’ll be tough reading about zombies and sex… but well as his mother I feel I should do my duty…..
Now about these cows. In Milton Keynes I saw this piece of conceptual art entitled Concrete Cows
Now apparently the Concrete Cows have at various points acquired BSE, zebra stripes, pyjama bottoms, cowpats and the services of a papier mache bull.
Now that is conceptual art.
Well, being the arty farty person I am I pondered the scene and thought this;
“Hmmm…. concrete cows.”
Then I went back to my car.
Copyright Mrs T 2009
11 responses
Loved the quote from Mrs Remic! Er, that is true, isn’t it? (Y’see, I don’t get out much …)
I had my own Chris Ryan/Andy McNab phase a while ago and picked up some choice expressions (like ‘get your s*** together’ for ‘get yourself sorted’) which I can’t use anywhere. Never mind. When you do the school run every day, the last thing you want to read about is someone else doing the school run – unless it’s your good self of course!
So Milton Keynes has remained true to the theme of cows. That’s heartening. I was very disappointed when I noticed once, after not travelling on that particular train line for a decade or so, that its fibre glass cows had been removed. Was nothing sacred — not even a sacred cow?
I’m now wondering what happens when you cross a papier mache bull with a concrete cow… apart from friction burns, of course.
PS. Master Sam is obviously a literary critic in the making. I like his style: succinct.
I really enjoed a series of books by Susan Howatch a few years ago – the Starbridge series, starts with “Glittering Images” all very intense and kind of sexily churchy if you can imagine…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Susan_Howatch
Mrs B,
Yes, absolutely true! Would I lie to you? Have I ever been known to pull a fast one? No, never!
OOo I am liking that Andy McNab/Chris Ryan saying! That is just my style. Hmm… so instead of saying at 8.20 am ” Now Young Master Ben have you got you book bag, water bottle, snack, PE kit and coat?” I could just say ” Got your **** together?” And off we go…..
Thanks for the heads up Mrs B, I’m looking forward to Monday morning already!
PB,
Please go no further with the friction burns concept – I’ve got enough problems feeling queasy with the young masters being unwell!
Ah yes, Master Sam. Gone are the days when every sentence was preceded by the word “Why”.
I now accept a small grunt as a means of communication. Slightly higher pitch means a “yes”, lower pitch means a “no”. Anthing in between means “I’m hungry.”
Hello Jacqueline and welcome to my blog!
I will check out your recommendation “Sexily churchy” has got me VERY intrigued! ( I think it’s best I don’t imagine anymore just for the moment; I may have to throw a bucket of water over myself!)
Gosh Mrs T – thanks for the welcome, although I have been here …before…
(Evil cackle)
Hi Jane
I’m just testing now I’ve set myself with my own blog! I wonder if you recognise me now.
Oh naughty, naughty Miss Jacqueline Hyde! I’ll be watching out for more cunning disguises!
Miss L,
Excellent! Excellent! I look forward to seeing you around the blogosphere! Check out Mrs B’s site (I’m a Housewife, Get me out of here)- I’m trying to encourage her to get moving but I fear I must purchase a rocket…..
Loved this post, Jane. And those book prices! They’re for nowt. I’ll be having a butchers in the Newcastle branch next time I’m in town.
Gary,
Like any of these discount places it can be a bit hit and miss at times but as my interests are fairly diverse I usually come away with something. Definately worth a gander though.