2500 x 500

The often dubious, politically incorrect and mainly humorous musings of Ms Jane Turley, (Ex) Housewife Extraordinaire.

#AtoZChallenge 2025

What A Balls Up – Adele at the Brits

Oh my goodness – did you watch the Brit Awards, The UK music industry awards, last night?

Absolutely hilarious. I cannot believe they cut Adele off at the beginning of her acceptance speech for Best Album to cut to pop/rock group Blur. Adele is the biggest thing in the music business at the moment – I’d hate to think of how much money our government has creamed off her in taxes – and the producers can’t even give her five minutes of well deserved glory!

The irony of it is how many times I’ve listened to long winded, cringingly embarrassing acceptance speeches and Adele looked like she was just going to give what I would call just a ” wholesome one.”In other words – a speech where I don’t have to do one of the following:

1.) Peep through my fingers as I do when I watch a horror movie when I am both appalled and yet strangely compelled to watch the gruesome events playing out in front of me.

2) Hide behind the sofa.

3) Throw up in a sick bucket.

4) Stick cotton wool in my ears

And

5) Emit various spontaneous phrases akin to;

 Oh dear God, I can’t believe she/he/it said that!

 It’s a good job her mother/father/entire family are dead because I don’t think I can take anymore.

 I can’t believe I am listening to this and (five minutes later) I can’t believe I’m still listening to this and (five minutes later)  I can’t believe I am still listening to this AND looking at that dress.

Remind me never to watch Titanic.

Somebody please, please, please tell her to STOP.

Do you think anyone’s called the ambulance yet?

How do all those people sit there and NOT shove that Oscar up her arse?


I’ve finished War and Peace. Have you seen The Bible anywhere?


Shall we watch The Muppet Movie?


And this is just the Highlights? Oh dear God.


Pass me the double bore shotgun: I need to end it all.


Anyway, Adele was pretty annoyed and stuck her finger up which is not very lady-like. But, then again, that’s what I do at most award ceremonies. So I kinda feel for her.

Latest Posts
A to Z: B is for Badass Brits.

Now, when I think of Badass Brits, I think of the likes of Jason Statham and Vinny Jones. Men with humble, working-class backgrounds who’ve made good and have a reputation as hard men in films. The kind of men who, 100 years ago, might have worked 12-hour shifts down the mines and still come home and dug the garden over.       Not like our present PM, Keir Starmer, who keeps trying to pass himself off as the son

Read More »
A to Z: Age is for Ageism

So, I reckon we should start off the A to Z with a rant on ageism and generally being old (read f***** over for the less sensitive amongst you.)   I know it’s hard to believe, but I started writing this blog in 2007 when I was 42. This makes me a dinosaur amongst the blogging community (i.e., I’m verging on the extinct), and last month, I turned 60.   Now, I know the kinder amongst you will be saying, “How

Read More »
New Website

After 18 years on another CMS, I have moved my blog to a more versatile platform. However, it will take some time while I perform some jiggery-pokery to get it exactly how I want it. So please bear with me as things fall off the page, are posted upside down and so on. It has also beome apparent that I will have to edit hundreds of posts as importing them has screwed up all the post layouts, especially paragraphs. This

Read More »
A Chicken Nugget A Day Keeps Justice Away

I have been forced. Yes, forced to come out of blog hibernation to comment on the latest scandal to hit the UK. God knows I have been tempted multiple times in the last few years to comment on some of the insane things happening in the UK and in the world, but sadly, life has just thrown too many curve balls at me. But today, I can take no more – I cannot keep my mouth shut any longer over

Read More »
My Nominees for the US and UK Elections and Other Waffle

It’s the early hours of the morning, and I have had a large gin… Late-night alcohol is always a good recipe for writing gibberish. And I have not written gibberish for a while on my blog as I have been busy writing gibberish for my MA in Comedy Writing. Which I recently passed with a distinction. Yay! Yes, it transpires that even academics can be fooled into thinking gibberish is genius. Excellent. So anyway, I have written two sitcoms, a

Read More »
Less is More (well that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it)

I’ve been practising my haikus, which you may recall, I’m not particularly good at. However, I wanted to address the woke issue in a concise, meaningful way as it is such a serious matter for discussion and particularly relevant to me as a comic writer. Which, if you know me,  translates as: 1) I’m too lazy to write a long analytical post. And 2) I’d rather watch a movie and eat tortilla chips. However, I feel obliged to say my

Read More »

2 responses

  1. Hi Jane, it was great telly though, wasn't it? Watching some TV producer muck up was a nice change from doing it myself I always find.
    And why oh why does it never happen when Kate Winset launches into one of her bum-numbing acceptance speeches?
    Anna May x

  2. True, Anna, true:)

    Generally, I find acceptance speeches (in whatever realm) pretty excruciating -I recall Roger Federer did an awful one at Wimbledon a few years back; I wanted to club him with his tennis racket.

    Kate Winslet? Say no more:)

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *