The often dubious, politically incorrect and mainly humorous musings of Ms Jane Turley, (Ex) Housewife Extraordinaire.
I thought why not just post a piccy of myself!
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| This photo has not been photo-shopped. However, I cunningly instructed the boys not to get my stomach or legs into the shot: a woman’s got to have some pride. Admittedly, I don’t have that much pride (bearing in mind I’ve just eaten one piece of flapjack and two chocolate chip cookies.) |
After 18 years on another CMS, I have moved my blog to a more versatile platform. However, it will take some time while I perform some jiggery-pokery to get it exactly how I want it. So please bear with me as things fall off the page, are posted upside down and so on. It has also beome apparent that I will have to edit hundreds of posts as importing them has screwed up all the post layouts, especially paragraphs. This
I have been forced. Yes, forced to come out of blog hibernation to comment on the latest scandal to hit the UK. God knows I have been tempted multiple times in the last few years to comment on some of the insane things happening in the UK and in the world, but sadly, life has just thrown too many curve balls at me. But today, I can take no more – I cannot keep my mouth shut any longer over
It’s the early hours of the morning, and I have had a large gin… Late-night alcohol is always a good recipe for writing gibberish. And I have not written gibberish for a while on my blog as I have been busy writing gibberish for my MA in Comedy Writing. Which I recently passed with a distinction. Yay! Yes, it transpires that even academics can be fooled into thinking gibberish is genius. Excellent. So anyway, I have written two sitcoms, a
I’ve been practising my haikus, which you may recall, I’m not particularly good at. However, I wanted to address the woke issue in a concise, meaningful way as it is such a serious matter for discussion and particularly relevant to me as a comic writer. Which, if you know me, translates as: 1) I’m too lazy to write a long analytical post. And 2) I’d rather watch a movie and eat tortilla chips. However, I feel obliged to say my
So this post is just going to be a stream of possibly (wildly erratic) thoughts. So hang on to your breeches; we could go anywhere with them. Cripes, I only managed three posts last year. And I call myself a writer? Pathetic! Though, to be fair to me, almost everyone who was blogging with me in 2007/8 no longer blogs or blogs even less than I do now. A few later blogs are still going, so kudos to those
An ex-secret service agent with a personality problem and a desire for imperial glory. An aged president who looks like he’s got a giant fork prong stuck up his arse to keep him upright. A floppy-haired bumbling classics graduate with a predisposition for crass decisions. A tinpot dictator who showcases his weapons like a movie trailer. A comedian who has found himself elevated to global status. If the world wasn’t on the brink of war this surely would be the
8 responses
Nice pic. Now that you have something more current, perhaps you could update your avatar? 😀
Thanks G and good idea. Do you think the slightly mad look is more appealing?:)
This is a much nicer picture than the one you posted a couple of weeks ago. You know, the one with the mad eyes and the axe? That will stay in my mind for quite a while…
Thanks Martin. Whilst the picture above is the real me – the axe looney probably bears a closer resemblance to my personality. God help anybody who gives me a one star review!
Nice photo. That's the one for the book blurb!
Do you think so, Mrs B? Not one of me looking all serious, one hand underneath my chin and the other holding a quill with a bottle of antidepressants placed strategically on a neat and tidy desk?
Hmm – I'm perplexed. I thought the tortured look would go down well.
The happy look then?
It has to be the way to go. The house and car in the background need to go, obviously. We're looking for a Jackie Collins/Jilly Cooper ambience. There needs to be a swimming pool in the sunshine and a hunk bringing you some girly cocktail. Sweet and salty, you see!
Golly, I'm good. I should have gone into PR ….
I'm liking that image, Mrs B. I'm not sure it's exactly truthful as with my current royalties all I can afford is a birdbath in the background, a cardbaord cut-out of some hunk and a plastic cup of diet lemonade:D