Any Moment Soon!

Yes…any moment soon the news we’ve all been waiting for in the UK will be hitting the headlines; the date of the forthcoming general election. After 5 years of Labour rule and 13 consecutive years of Labour government the country will finally go to the polls again. I’m one of many, I believe, hoping for a breath of fresh air … and I think this country certainly needs a real change.

But before you folks start worrying that I’m going to get too serious and bore you all to death with political ramblings let me assure you I will commentating on the proceedings in my own unique manner. Now in preparation for this stupendous intellectual feast I feel I should get into the right frame of mind – So naturally I’ve been contemplating sending Mr T some false expenses for some shoes I’ve never worn, a second mortgage for a house I don’t own, and £3.00 receipt for a sandwich I didn’t buy. However, then I thought twice about ripping Mr T off and decided the best thing to do would be to just “lose” his credit card in the spin cycle.

But then I had another thought – why not just get out my Chrissy prezzies and get in the mood that way? So here’s the first prezzie, a gift from the Young Masters;

Just in case you can’t read the writing on my mug it reads; “Politically Incorrect And Proud.” Yes, it’s true; Mrs T is one of a dying breed prepared to say Up Yours to Mr Brown. (And indeed anyone who annoys me including Katie Fforde (repetitive books), Beyonce (repetitive songs) and Basil Brush (ticklish tail.)

Hmm… you know I’ve been looking closely at my mug and I think there’s a slight fault…..the middle finger isn’t raised.

So anyway, whilst I’m giving you the lowdown on what’s happening in the UK I will be sipping my coffee (or maybe Options 40 calorie Hot Chocolate) from my Politically Incorrect And Proud mug.

Secondly, (and this a bit personal folks so breathe in) when I go to the Ladies Room I will be using my Gordon Brown loo roll;

Yep, whenever Gordon drops a clanger – I will be dropping one too – and you know where! Yes, yes I know it’s not very polite of me but remember I’m 45 – I haven’t got much time left to have fun!

(Oh by the way I expect to run out of paper by the end of the first week.)

And thirdly, I will be using this;

In case you can’t figure it out – it is an electronic drawing board which I got from Mr T for Christmas. Now I know I usually moan about my electronic gifts from Mr T (breadmaker, sat nav, washing machine etc etc) but I did actually request this in the vague hope that I might do something artistic – I don’t know what – but I’m sure that A Level in Art will come in useful one day. It hasn’t yet. Although … come to think of it…. I do use it to pull my artistic weight over Mr T when it comes to choosing colour schemes for the house;

Mr T; I like this green paint.

Mrs T; The cream is nicer.

Mr T; What about this blue?

Mrs T; Cream goes with everything.

Mr T; I fancy something a little different. How about that peach colour?

Mrs T: No.

Mr T: Lilac?

Mrs T; No.

Mr T: Yellow?

Mrs T: Look, which one of us has got the A level Art?

Mr T: (sighs) You have.

Mrs T: Enough said. Right that’s 5 tins of cream paint. 12 rolls of cream wallpaper and some cream cushions. You can have that small tin of green paint for your Airfix models. Oh…. and here’s your credit card; I found it in the washing machine.

So there you have it; watch this space for Mrs T’s highly intellectual guide to the UK elections. You may learn a thing or two – or very possibly – nothing!

Latest Posts

A to Z: B is for Badass Brits.

2 April 2025 1,067 Comments

Now, when I think of Badass Brits, I think of the likes of Jason Statham and Vinny Jones. Men with humble, working-class backgrounds who’ve made good and have a reputation as hard men in films. The kind of men who, 100 years ago, might have worked 12-hour shifts down the mines and still come home and dug the garden over. Not like our present PM, Keir Starmer, who keeps trying to pass himself off as the son

A to Z: Age is for Ageism

28 March 2025 27 Comments

So, I reckon we should start off the A to Z with a rant on ageism and generally being old (read f***** over for the less sensitive amongst you.) I know it’s hard to believe, but I started writing this blog in 2007 when I was 42. This makes me a dinosaur amongst the blogging community (i.e., I’m verging on the extinct), and last month, I turned 60. Now, I know the kinder amongst you will be saying, “How

New Website

14 March 2025 24 Comments

After 18 years on another CMS, I have moved my blog to a more versatile platform. However, it will take some time while I perform some jiggery-pokery to get it exactly how I want it. So please bear with me as things fall off the page, are posted upside down and so on. It has also beome apparent that I will have to edit hundreds of posts as importing them has screwed up all the post layouts, especially paragraphs. This

A Chicken Nugget A Day Keeps Justice Away

10 February 2025 8 Comments

I have been forced. Yes, forced to come out of blog hibernation to comment on the latest scandal to hit the UK. God knows I have been tempted multiple times in the last few years to comment on some of the insane things happening in the UK and in the world, but sadly, life has just thrown too many curve balls at me. But today, I can take no more – I cannot keep my mouth shut any longer over

My Nominees for the US and UK Elections and Other Waffle

31 October 2023 609 Comments

It’s the early hours of the morning, and I have had a large gin… Late-night alcohol is always a good recipe for writing gibberish. And I have not written gibberish for a while on my blog as I have been busy writing gibberish for my MA in Comedy Writing. Which I recently passed with a distinction. Yay! Yes, it transpires that even academics can be fooled into thinking gibberish is genius. Excellent. So anyway, I have written two sitcoms, a

Less is More (well that’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it)

2 February 2023 54 Comments

I’ve been practising my haikus, which you may recall, I’m not particularly good at. However, I wanted to address the woke issue in a concise, meaningful way as it is such a serious matter for discussion and particularly relevant to me as a comic writer. Which, if you know me, translates as: 1) I’m too lazy to write a long analytical post. And 2) I’d rather watch a movie and eat tortilla chips. However, I feel obliged to say my

Sy says:

6 April 2010 at 5:35 AM

Now Mrs T. Short of voting monter raving looney party (which I will be…), are you not forgetting that they are all the same. The Tories are Labour in Tory clothing. Labour are Tories in Labour clothing….and the lib dems are dressed in a gingham dress going to the ball where they will more than likely get dragged in to a bush and taken roughly from behind by a rabid budgie.

Reply
Jen P says:

6 April 2010 at 5:35 AM

Vote Wayward Wife! Vote Wayward Wife! (I'm starting the campaign now…well, OK, after my Options Belgian choc.)

Reply
Jane Turley says:

6 April 2010 at 5:47 AM

Master Sy,

You are indeed correct Sy. Not a lot of difference between the major parties – although I could use a gingham dress. I wonder if the Libdems would bring in compulsory gingham dresses?

There is one major difference between Labour and the Tory though – David Cameron. And I freely admit if I'm going to look at the PM on telly I'd rather look at his sorry ass than Brown's. (or indeed Brown's face!) Anyway, Brown has had long enough to cock things up – let's give someone else a chance! Come on play fair – equal opportunities and all that!

NB: No monsters around here – I may have to vote for myself:)

Jen,

Hello! Thank you for that support; I think I would make an excellent PM. Of course, I'd take the other Mrs T along as a consultant and we'd take the world by storm. First policy – compulsory Elevenses and Options Hot Chocolate for the entire work force – I'm onto a winner!

Reply
intrepidideas says:

6 April 2010 at 5:01 PM

Wow… I've been away for a while but I like the new look and feel of your site. You've done some house-keeping I see. Well Done! 🙂

Reply
Jane Turley says:

6 April 2010 at 5:15 PM

Thanks Mr I; glad you like it – and good to see you back:)

Reply
intrepidideas says:

8 April 2010 at 5:49 AM

It's good to be back! 🙂

Reply
hillgrandmom says:

8 April 2010 at 5:25 PM

To someone from another country, there is absolutely nothing even remotely exciting about this Brit election–nobody interesting one wants to follow or anything. Vote for politically incorrect WAYWARD WIFE!!

Reply
Jane Turley says:

8 April 2010 at 5:34 PM

Yep, you're right Sue – the election doesn't have the pull of the American election which had many interesting characters on the scene – and real international impact. Only 2 days in and already I reckon most people are already bored of the coverage – after the huge expenses scandal of last year no one believes a word they say anyway! I'm all for a hung parliament just so I can see how things pan out….

Reply