Blogging A to Z: U is for U Cannot be Serious and Uranus

Now I’ve been thinking over the blogging A to Z posts I’ve done so far and I’ve realised they’ve been a bit…well…how can I say it? Um…

Slipshod. And unintellectual.

Yes, that about sums it up. I think I peaked with the lazy posts yesterday because I actually fell asleep whilst writing my T is for for Thongs post. (That’s completely true.) And I woke up at 11.24 pm and all I’d written was a couple of lines and posted a picture. So then I had to find a way to finish the blog post as quickly as I could before I missed the 12pm deadline.

So anyway, I feel a bit embarrassed by my lackadaisical manner especially as, on the occasions I’ve hopped around some of the other participating blogs, I’ve found some highly intellectual and informative posts.

So I’ve decided that tonight I should write something intellectual too. So I’m going to write about Uranus!

Okay, so Uranus is pretty big and round. It has lots of gas and is surrounded by rings.

Pretty interesting stuff eh?

Now to study it further it would really help if you all could now get yourself a partner and we’ll get down to the details.

Now, this next bit is a little delicate but it will really help in understanding all about Uranus – so please get your partner to drop their trousers and bend over. If you’re a sad and lonely person and haven’t got a partner or a friend you can use a mirror.

Now put on some rubber gloves and get some vaseline at the ready.

 Oh excuse me for a moment, folks. Master Jacob (he’s the sensible son) wants a word in my ear.

What?


No really?


U cannot be serious.


Well that’s not what I was taught at school.


You’re sure?


A 100% sure?


You’re absolutely sure you’re 100% sure?


Yes yes, you can have the last jam doughnut.


Okay folks, I’m back. And I am a tad embarrassed. I’m afraid Master Jacob has told me that I have been misinformed and that Uranus is ..well…not what I thought it was …it’s actually a planet. Like Mars and Saturn. I thought it was well…well…uranus.

Oh gosh. I don’t know how I didn’t know this at my age. Although it does explain why my science teacher threw me out of a lesson once when she asked me to show her Uranus and I obliged. I thought she was just one of those mad menopausal teacher types – you know the ones – with Jesus sandals and a fetish for artificial sweetner.

Oh dear, dear, dear. I shall have to try and do better tomorrow. I shall have to do something really intellectual tomorrow to make up for today.

I know!

I’ll do a post on Venus. I’ve got lots of knowledge about Venus.

Master Jacob tells me this Uranus. It looks like a ping pong ball to me.

You can check out the other Blogging A to Z candidates HERE.